One of the most absurd cases we've had in 2.5 years Helferei Having experienced something similar at least provides food for thought on this question. And to state it clearly from the outset: No, this isn't simply a case of "bureaucracy failing" or someone doing their job incorrectly.
A family contacted us. The mother is pregnant with her second child and has an inherited heart defect. Normally, this would be treated with electric shocks under general anesthesia and remain regulated for several years. However, the heart defect has recurred during the pregnancy – and her doctors currently consider the treatment too risky.
The mother therefore lives with an increased risk of stroke and is also severely limited in her daily life. Even climbing stairs or walking longer distances is exhausting for her. The family already has a one-year-old child. The mother can hardly do anything with the child at the moment. A walk around the block? Too much. Carrying the child for any length of time? Almost impossible.
Two different doctors have therefore independently certified that she needs support with household chores and childcare until the end of her pregnancy. In such cases, statutory health insurance may cover these costs for affected patients (§ 38, sentence 1, SGB V).
We could have easily arranged this household help and babysitting at short notice through Helferei .
However, the health insurance company initially rejected the application, citing the applicable regulations.
The legal reasoning is remarkable and brought across the following:
Because the mother worked full-time before the re-appearance of her illness, it can be assumed that she would not have taken on household chores and childcare during those working hours anyway. Therefore, her illness does not create a corresponding additional need for support.
Those who do not work or work part-time may be assessed differently under German social security law.
But when do people working full-time, whether women or men, actually do their care work? Housework, shopping, laundry, childcare, and family organization don't disappear the moment an employment contract starts. They are done mornings, evenings, nights, and weekends – in the case of a 40-hour week, in addition to full-time paid work.
For decades, women in particular were criticized for going to work despite having children in Germany. Today, parts of the public and socio-political discourse simultaneously question whether people in Germany actually do work enough.
However, our structures often still don't suit couples where both people are employed.
In the specific case of the Helferei The customer also stated that the daycare center only wants to care for the family's first child until 3 p.m. They have decided that at one year old, the child is "still too young" for longer hours. The mother, due to her illness, can barely carry the child or walk long distances, and the father works until at least 5 p.m.
Who will now fill the resulting childcare gap for this family?
Those who expect more paid work from women and parents must also create the necessary conditions. This includes reliable childcare and help with household chores, support in case of illness, and an understanding that unpaid care work continues to exist even when people work 40 hours a week .
The family paid for their domestic help and support through the Helferei Initially, they cared for the children themselves for two weeks. They had no other choice, as they would have struggled to manage their daily lives without the support. However, it was clear that this couldn't be a long-term solution, even with two full-time jobs. The mother has since been able to use her remaining vacation time, formally proving that she is using this time for childcare. Only then was it possible for the much-needed support to be provided at home.
This case therefore reveals more than just a legal peculiarity. It raises a fundamental question:
What image of women and families is still embedded in our legal frameworks – and do these structures actually incentivize parents, and especially women, to work more?
What do you think? Do you have anything to add to this, or have you experienced similar stories?
Feel free to write to us at 📩 hallo@die-helferei.de – we always appreciate inspiration and exchange!
